Stop the Presses! Water is Wet and Taco Bell Might Be Weird!
Last week, some haters tried to blow up Taco Bell’s spot with the breaking news that the company is falsely advertising real beef. *gasp!* drive-through fare is questionable? Surely you jest! I thought that at this point we were all pretty sure that we have no idea what we’re putting in our bodies when it comes to fast food. I also thought that we were mostly comfortable with that. I’m not saying it’s the best excuse, but this is AMERICA. We have access to information at our fingertips that we choose to ignore because we’re free, dammit! “Isn’t it shameful that they inject so many hormones into baby cows so they grow up strong like bull?” “I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you as I am cutting into a steak as big as my face.”
While I can understand the disgust, I can’t possibly feel a sense of shock. It’s more like, “well now I know, and G.I. Joe once told me that knowing is half the battle. Now about those Nachos Bel Grande…” Aren’t tacos $1 there? I couldn’t possibly be getting the best meal for that kind of a price. When I know exactly what’s in my meat, it’s not usually getting scooped out of a 20 gallon pan with a sieved spoon. Am I going to do anything about it? Probably not. I invented slacktivism. Are the hundreds of people forwarding the link around going to do anything about it? Well I can’t speak for everyone, but how many of those same people that posted the link changed their picture to an 80’s cartoon for “child abuse awareness”? (seriously, what the hot hell does a picture of Cheetara have to do with a kid getting the shit beat out of him? No really, I’d like to know.)
There’s really no point to this post. I don’t have any suggestions. If the recent revelation makes you want to stay away from Taco Hell then that’s really good for you. I do wonder what you’ll eat while drunk, but I’m sure you’ll find something. If, like me, your body is a temple to trans-fats and sodium no matter the source, I’ll see you for our 1am chalupa.
p.s. Taco Bell says “hi haters” and that their meat is real. And it’s as healthy as you’d expect meat to be from a chain restaurant.
